(1:43am Wednesday morning)

For over 30 years,
The same dream haunted me –

I’m running.
Someone, something is chasing me.
If it catches me,
I’ll die.

Sometimes in the dream,
I get killed.

Other times,
I watch those I love die.

This replayed over & over again
Each & every night.

A few years ago,
My dreams shifted.
The nightmares became less frequent & intense.

Even though it softened my dreams a bit,
The new content taunted me –
As a new dream sequence
Started repeating each night.

In the past few months,
I’ve had another shift.

My dreams have become more random,
Less physically threatening.

Yet, somehow…
Even more intense.

I jolt awake several times a night
(Like I just did)
As if I stepped straight of
An alternate world.

My mind racing,
My heart pounding…
Part of me feels fully awake & alive,

While I try to hold onto
The quickly fading fragments
Of the content in my dreams

Knowing, as I always have,
That within them a message lies.

Sometimes the messages appear clear.
Other times not.

In all cases…
The vibrancy & intensity of my dream states
Are unparalleled in my waking life,

Which leaves me questioning,
Which is actually more real –

If in my dreams I feel more alive?

More importantly…
Am I missing some important message
From my subconscious mind?

Some piece of a puzzle
That would explain everything?
(And, thus give me peace of mind.)

Is this just my mind running wild
At moments when it’s tired & sleep deprived?

Cheetah on savannah in Africa

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Introvert. Avid reader. Social media shy. Animal lover. Yoga student. Green juice drinker. Whole Foods shopper. Tango dancer...

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