Do you ever feel you’re caught in a loop?

Days running into each other so quickly,
You lose track.

Each day feeling the same as the next?

I’ve struggled with this issue for a while.

A week starts.
A week ends.
A week starts again.

Each day feels pretty much like the last.
And, when it comes to my daily living stuff,
I’m constantly off track.

I took some time off to think.

Sometimes my mind speeds up so quickly,
I cannot hold a thought.

As it does,
My sense of overwhelm & feelings of stress
Go way up.

For most of my life,
I pushed through.

Like fighting a current,
I didn’t drown.
I also didn’t really move.

Over the past couple of weeks,
I’ve realized something
I already knew.

A large part of what overwhelms me
Is the repetition of it all.

For a long time,
I approached daily living
Like a project

Something that’s done.
Then, gone.

When it comes to daily life,
There is no end.

Each day I’ll have dishes to wash.
Dirty clothes will pile up again.

Repetition can be momentous.

It some traditions,
It’s also seen as meditative.

It represents the fundamental nature of life.

It repeats endlessly.
Until it ends.

In order to move forward
With a calm, present mind,

I need to shift my thinking.
Shift into the above mentioned meditative state

Instead of feeling weighed down in my life.

I need to work on
Bringing more joy into my daily tasks.

Life’s too short to not.

If most of what I spend my day on
Involves some sort of repeated or maintenance task,

I need to find ways to enjoy
(Or, at least not dread) it.

The “how”…
I’m still working on.

I’m assuming it will take time.

However long it takes,
It’ll be worthwhile.

Because otherwise,
That’s too much time in a day
To feel heavy & stressed.

I need to relax.

To find ways
To lighten myself.

Or, it’s going to negatively impact my health.

And, that’s a road
I’ve already been down.

Tomorrow is the first of new month.

I’m hoping to restart from there
In hopes of finding ways
To make life easier & more delightful.

To make stress
From daily stuff more rare.

 
christie
Learning obsessed. Growth focused. Wisdom seeking. Recovering perfectionist. In eternal struggle to tame obsessive compulsive tendencies.

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